Stay Sane in An Insane World

August 11, 2023

Stay Sane in An Insane World

BECOME your personal finest pal. “I can’t teach Tom Brady how to throw a ball,” says Greg Harden. “I can’t teach Desmond Howard how to catch the ball. I can’t teach Michael Phelps how to do a perfect flip turn. All I can do is teach you how to become the world’s greatest expert on one subject: yourself.”

The former University of Michigan Athletic Counselor Greg Harden has labored with world-class athletes like Tom Brady, Michael Phelps, Desmond Howard, and a whole lot of enterprise leaders and professionals from all walks of life and shares the cumulative knowledge from working with them in Stay Sane in An Insane World: How to Control the Controllables and Thrive.

How do you change into your personal finest pal? There are three issues high-performers have in widespread.

First of all, be coachable. “The first thing that Tom Brady and Desmond Howard had in common is that they were hungry for input, hungry for information, hungry to learn.”

Second is their perception in the means of self-improvement. “It’s a three-step process in which you commit to doing what it takes to make yourself better, then you do the hard work to improve your performance in EVERYTHING you do, and then you maintain that performance over time.”

The third factor is an intangible Harden calls the edge or an further gear. It’s “the ability to turn it up when you need to, even when it feels as if you were already giving 100 percent. To decide that you’re going to win. To decide that you’re going to find a way to push yourself, and everyone else around you, to another level.”

The path to this place is what Harden repeats again and again: “Control the controllables.”

Our potential to maintain functioning, each collectively and as people, as all the things will get turned the wrong way up throughout us—to concentrate on these issues that we can management when all the things else appears to be spinning uncontrolled—is extra priceless proper now than it has ever been.

When Tom Brady first got here to Michigan, he spent lots of time on the bench. He was discouraged, distressed, and overwhelmed. He mentioned, “The coaches don’t believe in me.” Harden mentioned, “You’re right. Why should they believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself.” He added, “If you believe in yourself, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. You’ve got to believe, whether you are playing, starting, or sitting on the bench, that you are capable, you are qualified, and you are confident.”

You wish to imagine that the exhausting work of training, coaching, and rehearsing for fulfillment gives you the correct mindset to show troubled instances into priceless classes that get you nearer to your objective.

“The greatest competition you’re ever going to face is yourself.” You should adapt or die. “You must train yourself to adapt to every possible circumstance, deal with any situation, use any object as a weapon to defend yourself. You adjust your thinking based on the changes that confront you. You roll with the punches. You improvise. You adapt.” Or you die. Again, the theme that runs by all the things he teaches is to regulate the controllables.

Harden says all of us want what he calls the Four A’s: Attention, Affection, Approval, and Acceptance. When you concentrate on your objective in life and your motivations is vital to maintain the Four A’s in thoughts as a result of “your motivations, the human desire to satisfy those basic emotional needs, are the 4 keys to understanding which of your attitudes, and behaviors are helping you achieve your goals—and which ones are holding you back.” Self-defeating attitudes and behaviors come from making an attempt to fulfill these wants in the incorrect manner.

Sportscaster James Brown as soon as mentioned on 60 Minutes that Harden was “Michigan’s Secret Weapon.” There is lots of strong recommendation that may be utilized to any of us in any space of life.

Throughout the e book are inspiring testimonials from folks Harden has labored with. They share the place they began mentally after which what he instructed them, and the way his insights performed out in their life and careers.

Ward Manuel remembers Harden telling him that “It’s not like when something bad happens in your life, you’re supposed to stop thinking about it. It’s going to bother you; it’s going to put you back on your heels a little bit. The message is, don’t let it be the only thing that you think about. Don’t let it stop you from finding a new way forward.”

Olympic gold medal winner Samantha Arsenault suffered a critical shoulder damage whereas coaching for the Olympics that threatened to take her out of the water and derail her self-image and everybody’s expectations of her as a world-class swimmer. Harden instructed her: “The only thing you even have a shot at controlling is how you see yourself. How you respond to this adversity. How you reframe your own thoughts. Because thoughts are real, Samantha. And the thoughts you’ve been having, how scared you are—it’s all to be expected if you’re a human being. If you are a robot, then you get a pass. Nothing to worry about, go to the shop and get your shoulder repaired. You’re good to go. But if you’re a real human being, then what does that mean? It means you’re getting tested right now. And you have the opportunity, right now, to decide what kind of person you’re going to be. You’ve got to decide that with or without your sport, your life is going to be amazing.”

Michigan soccer participant Michael Parke (now Professor Parke on the London Business School) was depressed over not getting time on the sphere, and he remembers Harden telling him, “This is not about soccer. This is about you becoming a man. Your job is to be as confident as you can be, regardless of what the coaches think of you. And to be ready, so that when your opportunity comes, you can take hold of it and never look back. Stop trying to change the coaches. Focus on what you can control. Control the controllables. Practice, train, and rehearse giving 100 percent until your coaches have no choice but to play you.”

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