It’s 4 solutions to 4 questions. Here we go…
1. My boss laid me off, then emailed my mom
My mom was a common buyer on the enterprise I work at for some years earlier than I used to be employed there. OldBoss likes to mentor staff and takes delight at those that transfer onto prestigious firms within the area. After my hiring, OldBoss gave me alternatives to develop my abilities and inspired me to get a diploma in our area.
After seven years of working there, I bought my diploma. Soon after, OldBoss inspired me to search for positions elsewhere. It wasn’t lengthy earlier than he subjected me to extreme bullying within the hopes I’d stop. At one level, he even requested why I used to be nonetheless there. After seven months of treating me as The Thing That Would Not Leave, he laid me off.
A month later, my mom talked about an e mail OldBoss despatched her. Did I get it? I didn’t, so she forwarded it. Paraphrased, it stated: “I’m sorry for taking so long to write this. I struggled to find the right words. Jane is stagnating at Business. I could promote her, but I don’t generate enough demand to hire a second role. I’ve begged her to apply to prestigious companies, but months later, she remained. I’ve laid her off so she can have more time to focus on job applications.”
How weird is that this message? That e mail was a lot nicer than something he stated to me in a whereas, however directed at a paying buyer.
Extremely weird. The complete factor is extraordinarily weird — after seven years of being a nice supervisor to you, he began bullying you to go away merely since you bought your diploma? And then emailed your mom about it? I assume he felt like he needed to say one thing to her since she’s a long-time buyer … however (a) he didn’t truly need to, (b) but when he was going to, that is a actually bizarre method to clarify his actions (claiming it was so you might have more time to give attention to job functions??), and (c) if he was that anxious about what your mom would assume, perhaps he ought to have rethought the bullying? It’s not like he may assume you wouldn’t inform her about it.
I hope your mom lets him know that is bizarre on each stage and takes her enterprise elsewhere.
2. Is it OK for my boss to request that I leverage my friendships (that are additionally half enterprise)?
I’ve labored in the identical smallish, regional area for the final decade, bouncing to a new group in the identical bubble each few years as new alternatives come up. Like a lot of smallish fields, I’d guess, these organizations are typically collaborators and typically rivals for a similar grants, shoppers, offers, and so on. As a consequence, my former colleagues are my pals, but additionally a a part of my skilled community. During the identical week, it’s commonplace that I might go to a good friend’s dwelling for dinner and then additionally encounter that very same good friend (who works for a totally different group) in a enterprise assembly to debate a potential collaboration. There are loads of points that may come up from this soup, however I wished to get your tackle one particularly that retains arising with my present boss.
He will once in a while (perhaps as soon as a week on common) ask me to leverage a social connection for our enterprise targets. Sometimes it appears pretty innocuous; for instance, once I talked about that I deliberate to see a good friend at a gathering over the weekend, he requested I remind the good friend that we’d like his resolution on a specific enterprise deal sooner reasonably than later. Other occasions, the request feels a little too far (however not within the realm of “I’m bowled over by the audacity”). Yesterday my boss requested if I might inquire what a good friend charged his shopper for a current work product as a result of we promote a comparable product, and figuring out this pricing info from a competitor would give us an edge available in the market. I care very a lot about sustaining this relationship with the good friend, and I feel that places each of us in a clumsy place.
This makes me uncomfortable and I feel my boss could be overstepping a boundary, however the place my pondering could be unsuitable is that since these friendships had been solid through the course of doing companies, perhaps it’s cheap to count on that that is par for the course? On the opposite hand, since my area is so small, apart from placing a good friend in a clumsy place, I’m very hesitant to behave in a approach that may have an effect on my candidacy for future positions if somebody interprets this friend-leveraging as inappropriate.
Yeah, that is tough! When it’s such a small group with a lot overlap, a few of that is going to occur naturally — however a good boundary is that if one thing is inappropriate to ask a enterprise contact (like asking a competitor for pricing information that would put them at a drawback), it doesn’t change into more acceptable simply because they’re a good friend. (Of course, you and your good friend may select to debate your charges when you had been each freelancers or comparable, nevertheless it’s not one thing your boss ought to ask you for.)
On the opposite hand, one thing like, “When you see Jim this weekend, could you mention we never received the RFP he was going to send?” is more gray. You shouldn’t have to make use of your friendships to hold enterprise messages in your boss … nevertheless it’s okay to make use of your individual judgment about whether or not it seems like a burden or will annoy your good friend.
In reality, “will annoy you or your friend” is one other good bar to make use of. If your intuition is that your good friend might be irked to have you ever delivering enterprise messages throughout a social get-together (or that you’ll resent having your time intruded on in that approach), it’s okay to say, “Jim and I have a strict firewall between business and friendship and he’d hate if I asked that this weekend, but I can email him to check on it separately if you want.” So you’re nonetheless providing to make use of a part-business relationship in a business-appropriate approach, however you’re sustaining boundaries on how and while you do it.
3. Is it unsuitable to just accept a promotion whereas ready for a job provide from one other firm?
I not too long ago utilized for a promotion at my present job and I’m ready for the choice. It appeared the apparent factor to do for the reason that particular person doing that job left and 80% of their tasks had been handed over to me. I’ve been annoyed for a whereas with my present place and confused by the workload and not having a actual definition of my scope of labor. This position would come with a greater title, a elevate, and a more particular job description vs. the jack-of-all-trades position I’ve now.
At the identical time, I used to be additionally contacted by a recruiter from one other firm for a position I’m very inquisitive about. I interviewed and made it to the ultimate rounds (thanks for all of the interviewing suggestions!) and I’m ready to see in the event that they lengthen a suggestion.
During all this, I noticed I’m very burnt out and simply plain uninterested in my present firm’s tradition, administration, and many points. So even when I don’t get a suggestion now, I’ll nonetheless be seeking to depart the corporate within the close to future.
If I’m supplied the promotion earlier than I hear again from the brand new firm, would it not be unethical to just accept it figuring out I’ll positively depart sooner reasonably than later? I concern saying no to the promotion or withdrawing my utility at this stage could be seen as a fake cross. But would saying sure and leaving (hopefully) three weeks later be even worse?
It’s tremendous to just accept the promotion even when you find yourself leaving shortly after. Unless you’ve gotten a agency provide that you simply’ve accepted, you don’t know when you’ll be leaving for one more job within the close to future so it is sensible to proceed as when you aren’t (and due to this fact not flip down raises, promotions, or different issues that profit you). If you do find yourself needing to resign quickly after you’re promoted, you’d simply acknowledge the timing and say, “This fell in my lap and was too good to pass up.” That occurs … and if they’ve any sense, they’ll notice that when you had been looking for a promotion, after all you may need been making use of different locations too.
4. Company closes the week earlier than New Year’s — however it’s a must to take PTO for it
My sister is a bodily therapist who does toddler and toddler dwelling well being. Her firm is non-public, however they get a lot of presidency funding. She began in February, and simply came upon the corporate is closed between Christmas and New Year’s Day. Seems nice – besides they need to take obligatory PTO!
As a tech employee, this blows my thoughts. They can also’t take an excessive amount of unpaid time, as a result of it will boot them off their medical insurance. I think about that is could also be authorized, however even whether it is, how do you recommend they speak with administration about amending this coverage? They don’t have a union. They accrue pretty customary PTO for U.S. healthcare staff, however nothing so beneficiant that will make a pressured week over the vacations appear regular.
This is definitely actually widespread. It sucks since individuals don’t all the time need that week off, nevertheless it’s not an unusual follow. Of course, the more preferable follow for firms that shut down that week is to present it as a freebie reasonably than subtracting it from individuals’s PTO — which is strictly what higher firms do.
If your sister and her coworkers need to push again, they need to level out that folks may want to avoid wasting their PTO for different issues — particularly issues that take a good chunk of time (for instance, touring internationally) — and additionally they, you recognize, won’t have a good time Christmas and want to make use of their PTO for their very own holidays… but when they’re in a area the place it’s widespread, they won’t get a lot traction.
